You’re off on your fourth date with the person you’ve been deeply infatuated with. You’re at a table, talking about various things, from philosophy to sports. Your face is plastered with a big smile and laughs are the only sound you hear. All your stresses, anxieties and burdens are non-existent.
As you sit and chat, someone opens the door and walks in. They are extremely attractive, model material. They are fit, confident and carry a presence with them. Whatever mental perfection you would create of a person, is walking right past you. To say you’re not insecure at all would be a lie.
Now consider something in this moment: The way the individual in front of you responds in this situation is worthy of deep thought. As you talk to them, what happens? You know who just walked in as much as they know. Are they still obsessed with your thoughts and mind? Are they unbothered and deeply focused on your smile still? Is the way they react the same it would be if no one walked in at all?
Or do you find yourself feeling even more insecure by their immediate lack of focus? Do they stare? Are they clearly not in that moment with you anymore? Do they constantly glance over at that individual? Consider that their reaction to this is a great way to determine the reality of that individual’s attachment to superficiality.
Of course, this can easily be viewed as over generalization, but the reality is this moment is authentic and subtle. Nothing will probably come of this; you will keep talking to them and the day will proceed. But this has meaning. The quiet moments such as this are only a small piece of something much deeper. Always pay attention to even small details, especially as you get to know an individual.
To be blunt: if someone is superficial, do not even get involved. You are creating your own inevitable failure. Why invest into something that will not last? The world gravitates to social status, money and looks. These are the adult candy people crave. The problem is once they get that candy, they only want another piece. People who are on strings to the world create their own unhappiness. They are never actually satisfied in a relationship because they are always, in the back of their minds, trying to find the next person to commit to in hopes of a more powerful high. They get bored in their relationships and find themselves breaking their own morals because of their deep desire for the world. They justify their bad actions, find ways to short end the ones they’re with and have an ego that’s blown up like a balloon. If you get involved with them, you are setting sail in stormy, dangerous waters. Be prepared for more overthinking, anxiety and insecurity. If anything, these type people will magnify every issue you already have. If this isn’t enough…it’s a complete waste of your valuable time. It will fail.
Then we have those who are not superficial. Those who are fully invested into romance and love. These are the individuals who deeply value intellect, communication and depth. The difference between these people and the ones above is simple: They comprehend what a happy relationship actually is, not what society tries to tell them. These individuals are never impressed by nice bodies, pretty smiles and money. They value good communication, hard work and trust. They have their own personal goals, but they also comprehend the balance in sacrifice. Even if the sacrifice seems ridiculous in their eyes…they see its purpose. They comprehend that a relationship is constant effort and needs to be watered daily. They never have a blown-up ego towards their partners. They don’t have a “if they can’t handle me, they can leave” attitude but a calm, peaceful comprehension of sacrificial balance.
Your happiness ultimately rests on the person you choose to be with. Consider your happiness to be a glass cup and you’re handing it over to the person you allow in your life. It is a very fragile glass; you protect it at all costs but allow that person to take it from you. Every bit of happiness you experience in life rests with this little glass cup. Is the person you’re handing your cup to able to protect it as much as you do?
In a toxic society full of people who simply don’t understand what happiness actually is, only allow people who are truly obsessed with your mind into your life. Too often people are overly concerned with their bodies, income and status that they toss their own beautiful minds into the backseat like a fast-food wrapper. Do me a mental favor, imagine for a moment the difficulty in being a famous celebrity. You’re rich and attractive, complete with social status to easily get whatever you desire. Sounds amazing, right? well consider that with all of this comes the fact that you will never actually know if someone is with you for you or for your money and social status. In a sense this forever cloaks your ability to know who is authentic and who’s not. What a curse? To finally achieve such success only to be blind to who is real? The blessing me and you have is we’re not celebrities, so we can attract others with depth. If we play our cards right, we can truly know who we are dealing with. Don’t attract through your body, money or status…this creates your own distractions and cloaks your ability to distinguish authenticity. Consider making your mind your greatest value that you offer to others. Out of all the amazing things that you bring to the table, make your beautiful mind number one on that list. By doing this, you can truly know that others will only want you for you, not for the number of digits in your bank account or appearance.
Happiness is quiet. It is not loud or fancy. Happiness is simple. it loves to be behind the scenes, like a lone wolf. Happiness never attempts to one up anyone or anything, it simply exists. Happiness is peaceful and content…like a slow river running through a beautiful mountain valley. Happiness is always in a direct contradiction to society, becoming its polar opposite.
Be happy.
NO ATTACHMENT IS FREEDOM 