Author: So just let go-

the year is 1962. Beautiful fall weather, complete with cloudless skies above the Atlantic Ocean. Unfortunately, you can’t experience any of its beauty, you’re far beneath the ocean surface in a dark submarine.

What should be a peaceful day is nothing less than an absolute nightmare for you. You became the executive officer a year earlier of the submarine you’re in, the B-59. It was an honor at the time, but now you would do just about anything to rewind time. You’re a part of the Soviet navy and were attempting to get to Cuba, the nation that now is a part of your Soviet Union. Your submarine was attempting to subtly swim through the ocean waters to Cuba without any issues, yet this hope has deteriorated entirely. A number of United States Warships lie above the waters, and they’ve detected you. How do you know? Ahead you notice small explosions in the water which are originating from their ships. It seems they not only have found your submarine but also are trying to attack you. You question why the explosions are so small, yet don’t have the time to think about it. Your worst fears, the product of overthinking, have come true. You are in a terrible situation. The sweat drips from your face to the point you have to loosen your attire. You know the deep tension that exists right now between your homeland and the United States. The number of nukes that both the United States and the Soviets have is terrifying to your soul. The idea of a nuclear war is far too real, knowing that the slightest brush with an American ship would be the last straw. millions of people would die from a conflict. It’s as if your homeland and the United States are both on tightropes, trying to tediously not make a wrong step.

The submarine you’re in isn’t your average vessel, either. It holds a uniquely powerful warhead that would cause thousands of American navy workers to vanish in the blink of an eye. Once you shoot that warhead off, World War three is virtually confirmed. The United States warships ahead have no clue you have such a powerful weapon. It would catch them by complete surprise. They would be dead before they even know what hit them.

There are two other men of leadership on your vessel and you’re second in command. The rule is all three of you must agree on any decisions. The little bombs the United States warships are tossing underwater at you is not hitting your submarine, but around it. Seconds feel like hours as you frantically grasp your thoughts and try to figure out the next move. The heat from the mini explosions is causing your submarine to radically increase in temperature. It’s as if you’re in a metal Barrel with someone hitting it with a sledgehammer. With each mini explosion the whole submarine shakes violently. Heat just continues to rise, and you notice some of the crew getting lightheaded. The noise that is produced from the bombs is so loud it hurts.

The other two men who have authority on the vessel are yelling in fear. All chaos has broken lose on your submarine. The heat constantly going up, seeing men pass out and the violent shaking from the explosions is causing everyone to lose all self-control and rationale. Your respected boss is almost in tears as he screams to you about what should happen next. Sweat drips to the ground from the heat. Your heart is pounding. “Maybe the war has already started up there! We’re gonna blast them now” He screams. The other man in command quickly gives his green light to act. In a moment’s notice, you realize that you’re the only obstacle to sending off the bomb. The entire world as you know it, literally, rests upon what you do next.

You’re feeling the overwhelming effects of anxiety, fear and stress but your mind is clear enough to think rationally. You stop. Take a breath. Stare at the hot metal wall in front of you for a few seconds, to relax yourself. The other two in command are freaking out, losing all sense of clarity as they wait for your response. While several crewmembers are on the ground, heat so high you can barely breath and the submarine shakes to the point to where you can barely stand, you look at them and firmly say “no”. They almost both have anxiety attacks as they wipe the sweat off their foreheads. Shock is in their eyes. This immediately turns into an all-out verbal warfare of its own, with all three of you fighting for direction. You continue to tell them the logic behind doing such a thing, that even if the United States is trying to start a war, it’s not worth the risk. Your calm, firm presence is contagious to the men around you. After a few minutes of focused, bold communication with the two shocked men, they finally seem to be relaxing and grasping your logic. The three of you collectively agree to turn around and go back home. One of the exhausted crewmembers quickly turns the submarine back to the homeland and the submarine cools off, giving everyone a moment to just breathe and relax. The passed-out crew begin waking back up. It is so much more… quiet now. You sit down and your body is cold now from the sweat. You feel like you ran the longest marathon of your life.

As you head through the deep waters of the Atlantic Ocean back home, you know that the political leaders waiting for you are going to be very unhappy. Look at you as afraid. As men who can’t stand up for anything. Your leaders will cringe at your lack of action. Even through this discouraging thought, you find an intoxicating level of peace. The full comprehension of what just happens hits you deeply. You had more power in that single moment than any human being to have ever existed. You stopped an entire nuclear war, most likely either causing the destruction of mankind or at best, millions of lives would have been lost. Your name is Vasili Arkhipov.

For those of you who don’t know this name. Never forget it. During the Cuban Missel Crisis in 1962, This man single handily stopped the world from ending. It’s hard to imagine that an entire World War with Nukes, all rested on one man, in the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean. Mr. Arkhipov is arguably the most important human being to exist the past hundred years. If he would have simply said yes instead of no, we very well might not be here. The interesting thing here is that above, the United States ships that were shooting explosions to the submarine were not trying to attack it. They were simply trying to shoot small explosions off underwater, a tactic used to signal to the submarine to come up. The radio communication from the submarine to the Soviet nation was not working and this was beyond confusing to the crew in the submarine. They had no idea what was going on. This miscommunication was the source of everything.

Cuban Missile Crisis

The context of the Cuban Missile crisis caused Americans across the United States to feel deep bouts of fear, anxiety and stress. The Soviet Union was giving Cuba, Nukes. As you know, Cuba is under one hundred miles from the coast of the United States. To make matters worse, the United States had no clue of this, only to have discovered it after the nukes were already in Cuba. The instance above was after America had already discovered the nukes and had set up warships around Cuba. The entire Cuban missile crisis only lasted about twelve days. But each day was terrifying for the American public. Imagine the reaction of President John F. Kennedy when he was originally told of nukes so close to shore? Imagine the way the American public must have felt when he revealed to the nation that there is a line of nukes pointed at America in Cuba? You turn on your television with the president trying to convince your terrified soul that everything is somehow going to work out? How lucky, or blessed, can we be, in this moment, for good men and women from our past? The reality is this is only one extraordinary historical situation that we are aware of regarding war. I deeply consider just how many other situations actually occurred in history that were never written, or verbally told, that helped us win or avoid War? The millions of soldiers and difficult decisions that mankind will never discover. All the subjective experiences that the countless soldiers, from both sides, had while fighting. It is mind blowing to consider this thought.

Consider your Freedom

Not to change the subject too much, I do have another thing to say. The fact that you’re even reading this right now is worthy of deep thought. Millions of men and women have died for us to have the freedoms we have today in this nation. We live in a society where many people have absolutely no clue of the horrors and nightmares men and women faced to have the freedom we have today. In fact, many people have nothing more than hatred for the “USA”. At the very least, independent of whatever resentment you have about history, just comprehend that right now, you have freedom. This is a fact. Freedom to read this. Freedom to talk on social media. Freedom to start a business. The list goes on… Consider that even right now, in this moment, families are suffering and dying as they attempt to cross the border to this country. Trust me, if there was a way where they could swap places with you, they would have done it already. I’m not a gambling man but I’d toss all my dice on that the same people who hate on this country would be the same ones who reject such an offer. I feel that we all have things we dislike about the countries past, it is most definitely brutal, unfair and irrational, yet we must always have comprehension of the beautiful things we have from those who died and suffered for our current situation. It’s far too convenient to forget these things.

I hope that we can use such courageous moments from the past to give us strength in the present. Never forget Mr. Arkhipov. A man who even under such extreme stress and turmoil stood by his good character, thus preventing a nuclear war. His decision was the ultimate in humility and awareness considering that he was thinking more about mankind instead of even his country.

-Jarom

Note: “metal Barrel with someone hitting it with a sledgehammer” is literally the description used by a Mr.Vadim Pavlovich Orlov, who was aboard the submarine.

The response of the caption above, to Vasili Arkhipov (1st person above) about shooting off the warhead is his literal words

In 1665, a young college student was forced into quarantine from a vicious worldwide plague. He packed his bags and went back home to his family’s estate.

He was alone. He didn’t have zoom or skype to get direction or help from professors. He didn’t have an iPhone to flip through for Quora or reddit. No way to conveniently jump on YouTube for help videos. He had no significant other to infatuate over or lose his thoughts to. No attachments to anything except his purpose and goals. All the strings that hold down most people were torn, leaving him with nothing less than mental and emotional liberation.

Two years later, in 1667, He went back to college having discovered Calculus, the foundation to optics and the laws of gravity. The amount of productivity that was accomplished in such a short timeframe was borderline supernatural. He changed the way humanity views the world, alone. Scientists can only stand in confusion at how one twenty-five-year-old man could pull off such a ridiculously difficult task. To discover any one of these truths in a lifetime is fascinating, to discover all of them in two years, is astonishing and incomprehensible. His Name? Isaac Newton.

The world we live in today has countless things constantly screaming our name. From social media to work obligations, it seems our minds are consistently being bullied by distractions. We are all only a button away from looking at exotic vacations and social outings of other people. Social media has a way to make us feel as if we need constant social interaction to be happy or content. We must always be around our friends, at a club or bar. We must always be traveling with other people to truly experience the fullness of “life”. Our overall emotional well-being is held down by being alone, according to society. If you’re not “out” doing things, you’re essentially wasting away your life. Social interaction is part of being human, right?

I argue that being alone is necessary to make your mark in society. Consider the beauty in solitude. Being alone is a cheat code for success. When you’re alone, it reduces distractions significantly. The ability to truly let go of any attachments and hyperfocus on one thing is like pressing FastForward on a video. Consider being alone like a unique tool, one you can use to double your speed and efficiency. The amount of sheer time one gives away towards attachments ruins our focus more than we consider. How often are we thinking about things that have nothing to do with our passions? Do you think the amazing men and women before us who changed society allowed their minds to be infatuated with romance, entertainment or social status while they pushed themselves to success? The best way to make sure you’re lost in what matters is to let go of attachments and society for a time to get something done. It doesn’t have to be forever, even just a few months or years. A part of the equation for success is to walk a lonely road. Personally, I have argumentation for why no attachment to everything except passions, for life, is freedom (name of this website), but that’s a whole different direction.

Embrace solitude. Love it. To be alone, having no one around…just you and your thoughts can be such an incredible experience. Ignore society, walk the opposite direction of what it tells you and hyperfocus on your passions. When your mind is free from distractions, the door is fully opened for them to flow freely. If someone is religious, no matter what belief they have, the likely hood of divine intervention is far more probable, alone.

I believe that meditation is the key to true happiness in life. Our minds are the source of our peace, content and overall emotional well-being. How fascinating is it that someone can be dirt poor, have nothing and genuinely go to bed at night with an honest smile? One can have everything, social status, money and looks yet still be deeply troubled mentally to the point they are drowning in sadness. The consistent aspect here is the state of the mind of these two individuals. Content ultimately is the single greatest concept we as human beings can possibly understand. If I had ten seconds to tell my sixteen-year-old self-something, I’d anxiously tell him to marry content and comprehend its meaning. Interestingly, people are sent to solitary confinements as a form of severe punishment in life. It is the ultimate in suffering for even the worst criminals. If this doesn’t prove that being alone isn’t a hell on earth for people, I don’t know what is. With this being said, I believe one can be in solitary confinement for years and still be happy. Our entire experience as “human” is our minds. It is, quite literally, everything to our happiness. My purpose in going over content here is to help you comprehend that being alone should never be a treacherous journey, but a peaceful, content one. Your mind determines your happiness.

Go out and change the world. Stab a deep mark into society before you leave it. Even if you don’t do it, you tried and that gives you existence a higher purpose. Never look at solitude as a negative thing, but a perfect opportunity to change the world. Never toss your happiness to other people or things, allow them to only add to what you’ve already created, alone.

-Jarom

Imagine with me for a moment, that instead of having bodies, we all floated around with only our brains. All we had was our consciousness and nothing more. Men had no way to show off their six packs or sharp jawlines. Women had no way to show off their curvy bodies or smiles. We all just floated around, our brains all looking the same. Consider with this, we would lose all forms of bodily lust and physical superficiality. Racism would cease to exist. There would be no skin colors. Just the same pink brains all over the world.

All we could really go off of is the other individual’s character, intellect and personality. The only way we could connect with each other is strictly limited to consciousness and human emotion. It would be a brain communicating with a brain.

this would connect mankind on such a deep level that it’s almost incomprehensible. It would cease superficiality and fully open the door to the fact that we as humans are so similar. Think of all the billions of people before you existed and right now, who suffer because of the way they look? How many people were killed because of how they look? How many children were bullied because of their height, weight or features? How many people were never content because they never could find the right physical features in someone? How many people look in disgust in the morning at the reflection in the mirror? How many people have unhealthy bodily obsessions because they constantly fight to keep up with social media? How many people are unhappy now because of what they offer, physically? All the millions of innocent victims of racism and prejudices? All the judgments tossed on people without having a clue of who they actually are?

We all are human. We all hold hands with fears, anxieties, overthinking and worldly stress. Bills are constantly knocking on all our doors. Taxes love to ruin our peace. We all crave affection and love. We all hope to find the “one” who could be a loving companion forever. Insecurities are embedded in even the most attractive individuals. We are much more similar as a human species, then different. The almost 8 billion people in the world all connect on such fundamental aspects of existence.

I argue that external appearance is one of the most destructive aspects of mankind. We as humans, have created our own chaos and madness. Humans have brutally murdered, bulled and judged each other for thousands of years simply because of external features. This includes height, weight, facial aesthetics and skin color. Imagine if humanity had the comprehension of looking directly into each other’s minds, to focus on who that person really is? To bypass everything external and dig directly to what actually matters? Something as deeply insignificant as physical appearance have destroyed the happiness of billions. Skin deep is less than an inch at its thickest. Just think of all the racist actions, bullying, insecurity, judgments and tribalism of humanity, based off skin deep. To break it down, less than an inch of skin on each one of us has determined the overall peace and unity of humanity as a whole. Let that sink in.

If I see an individual who is having a public freakout, I typically find myself laughing from secondhand embarrassment. I shake my head; hope they realizes just how ridiculous they look. What I’m not doing is comprehending how this same individual is fighting demons, could have lost a loved one, deeply insecure or suffers daily from a nightmare in their little world. Of all the terrible things going on in their life, I can easily connect with them on some of their issues. I too have lost loved ones, felt the mental anguish of anxiety. I too have my own insecurities and little demons. If we could consciously remove their bad behavior and talk to their brain, we would see a beautiful but lost individual, suffering in ways you can relate deeply to. The uniquely beautiful thing about being human is that even some of the worst people you know share the exact same emotions you do such as fear, anxiety and overthinking. There is not some state or country where people lack the emotion of fear. There is not a continent in our world where people don’t feel anxiety. It’s a common trait to every living person. It’s a part of our existence. From insecurity to trust, our similar desires are the same. I challenge anyone to read this, if you even made it this far, to deeply consider these thoughts the next time you’re on the receiving end of negative energy. Fight the urge to think negatively of them and look at them for who they actually are…a reflection of yourself. If anything, this fact alone can be medicine to your resentment or frustration. It has a calming effect on a soul.

Consider the fascinating fact that you could grab a complete stranger from a different continent who grew up in an entirely different culture and talk to them about life. You could literally sit down with them laugh, smile and cry together off nothing more than being human. We grow up in entirely different little worlds, unique cultures and parents, all have different influences pulling for our attention, yet we all hold hands on being human.

Our current society fights as hard as it cans to divide us. Frankly, it’s doing an excellent job at it. Consider just the news, how it takes things out of context to make us feel “different”. It selectively picks whatever it can to divide us. Even just one bad video, out of context, has the potent power to divide millions. Social media values someone off their bodies and beauty, drawing a mental line in the sand to make people feel “different” than each other. Movies and the media also subtly put things into their narrative to slowly create a quiet line between us. The reality is, these narratives are constantly whispering to our consciousness that we’re different, thus covering up the reality of our commonalties. Deep embedded negative thinking likely harasses millions, strictly due to societies constant false narratives. The scary thing about this is it’s winning.

I push for all humanity to deeply consider these things. I argue that we as humans are going to the wrong sources to find peace and unity. It starts with finding our similarities and obsessing ourselves with these thoughts. We must, as a people stop putting external factors so high. In fact, we need to actually reduce its importance dramatically. Our obsession with external factors is what is causing our destruction. It is pulling us apart. I see no light at the end of the tunnel regarding the terrible numbness we have to are similarities. This is troubling. I grant that humans naturally are visual creatures, but this is not justification to turn our heads to being human. It’s up to us, collectively to change our little worlds into a different direction, to obsessively be aware of these similarities. The value of someone else’s little world, conscious experience is swimming in the same waters as you. Consider the symbolic world of floating brains, all the same color. To connect with others on this level is a new level of depth humanity needs to strive for.

all love

-Jarom

At the moment of death, the greatest mystery of mankind will immediately be answered for each and every one of us. My loved ones who passed, know. I do not. Even just one individual who has passed away has more knowledge of our existence then anyone walking this planet, right now.

We have four thousand religions, numerous deep scientific theories and philosophical ideas fighting for just this simple answer. The confusion lies in which one is actually correct?

How odd is it, that we randomly appeared on earth when we were born, having absolutely no knowledge of where we came from or if we actually came from anywhere? We feel so deeply valuable, our minds are always active and working yet we do not remember anything before we were born. We just…appeared. Since then, our lives have formed into what they are now. Maybe you have your own family. You’re focused on your goals and passions. You are actively studying for a career. It almost seems that we’ve never not existed. Do you remember anything before you were three years old? You were alive then, yet we lack any knowledge of this time frame. Our brains lacked the capacity at that time to retain information. The idea of us not existing forever is difficult to imagine. It almost feels like we are valuable enough to have always existed, doesn’t it?

A part of me, typically in the evenings when I’m alone sits and feels a certain level of anxiety when I process that I must one day die. I have no clue when it will be. As much as I deeply ponder my existence and the afterlife, I’m at times overwhelmed with the idea of death. If we did, hypothetically cease to exist, then how would that hurt? How could that somehow cause suffering? The reality is if that would be the case, it wouldn’t cause any anguish. We wouldn’t even know it. To not think. To not have anything…just disappear quit literally. To become nothing. The anxiety I have lies in knowing that if that were true, we ultimately have no real meaning to life. Humanity would have no more meaning than a colony of ants if we cease to exist at death. Even for one to say that their purpose is to support their families or change humanity, it is ultimately meaningless. You would be supporting your family so they too, one day can cease to exist? Change humanity for what? For people way down the road and benefit from only to cease to exist one day? The only logical conclusion an atheist can have to meaning is to optimize well-being in the moment. This of course is in no way bad, but to argue that we have any overall purpose as humanity if we all disappear at death is absurd. On top of all of this, just the idea of myself ceasing to exist is dreadful. To know that all my moments and relationships will mean nothing to me, forever destroyed, is a nightmare.

I heavily lean to the idea of a higher power of some sort. Not saying I know which God of the four thousand he is, I cannot describe him, but just some sort of creator. There has to be a beginning at some point. One cannot honestly accept reality for what it is and deny the idea of a start. Everything has a cause. Most theists already know about this argument for God. I must admit I question his motives, why he would allow there to be such mass confusion in the world. The fact that there are so many different religions complete with unique Gods and doctrines is uncomfortable to me. I would think that any God who actually wanted his followers to go his way, would at the very least, provide a narrower path. unfortunately, we have thousands of options to choose from, each believing they are in fact, the correct religion. What makes it even more difficult is that many of these religions claim to pray to God and receive confirmation that their religion is true, thus making it impossible to truly know which one is truth. We have no solid scientific evidence of God, for instance God has not come down on Fox news to chat with a reporter and explain which doctrines are accurate, we only have people’s subjective experience to determine truth, which of course is the main reason there are so many countless religions. Some religions have sacred books to base their faith off of which gives them a foundation, but there still is a point where faith comes in. Take Islam and Christianity. Both have sacred books. Both claims to be the true church. Both believe their prayers have been answered by God as a confirmation that they are right. Both are extremely popular in the world. If an innocent open mind is honestly searching for truth, he is tossing his dice for truth here. How would a loving God above expect us to know here? Your answer is as good as mine.

The other weird ideas of course are that we get passed into a different dimension, we wake up somewhere else. One must realize that our own consciousness is abstract, cannot be seen or studied. It quite literally, by scientific terms is supernatural. If we have no clue about it, then who’s to say it doesn’t go somewhere else? After all we can’t see it. It might float to another world or time. Our severely lacking knowledge of our conscious is fascinating to me. The more I look into our minds, study it the more I firmly think there is more to life after we die. I’ve seen countless atheists, smart and intellectual, who simply ignored the idea of an afterlife while simultaneously knowing that our own consciousness is a mystery. I have no idea how they can jump to such conclusions without knowing more about the human mind. Rather you believe in God or not, one must have more information before acting on answers. If anyone is overly confident of no life after death, they are in an odd way committing a massive act of faith themselves.

The last issue I see is that of suffering in the world. This alone is probably a fundamental aspect of many current atheist today. To be honest, they do have a point. Just imagine all the thousands of years before us, the billions of people who suffered. Consider in your mind, the worst possible way to die. Whatever in your mind you would imagine as the absolute worst, dramatic, painful way to humanly die. Now know that the worst possible pain imaginable in your mind is not close to the actual pain someone has felt. The extent a human conscious can suffer is far greater than we can understand unless we are actually feeling it ourselves. The terrible events from World wars. Medieval slaughters. Terrible accidents. Children being born, seemingly set up for failure based off no fault of their own. Being born and dying at the age of five. We have uniquely painful situations of someone losing their entire families all at once. The list of various sufferings is countless. The point here is, another human being can feel such incomprehensible pain who is just as valuable as you are. They have goals, passions and romantic hopes. They too want to be happy and content. They hope to live until they’re ninety years old also. Yet they don’t. This idea deeply bothers me, it’s something I to this day, cannot grasp. A part of me almost feels a certain level of guilt for not suffering. This may not make sense, but to my intellectual mind it’s a reality.

Lots of thoughts tossed into my brain. The goal for every one of us is to find answers to questions and be open to healthy dialogue. To be able to discuss deep issues without emotion is a beautiful thing. We should work on reducing bad ideas and finding good ones. To increase world peace and happiness is the ultimate goal for humanity. The biggest questions to all humanity are still very much left unanswered. Be open minded and always consider new ideas.

Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Ok-Cupid. Dating app bosses, all fighting for your attention to help you find someone who can be your peace. No matter how much you seem to connect to a new person, you always seem to have a part of your brain thinking about what “could” happen if you kept on your search. Welcome to modern dating. I find myself debating if having many options is any better than having any. To me, the ability to have lots of options in dating is a curse. Many attractive individuals conveniently skip over this extensive issue. Constantly seeking someone only to find out that person is never quite good enough. The sad reality is without content one can never be happy, yet millions of young adults are already far too sluggish in their pursuit of it as it furthers its distance from them.

the logic behind dating apps is aligned perfectly with someone who gambles. When someone gambles in Vegas, they go in with the idea of only doing a little or stopping if they lose X amount of money. This same person wins a small sum and immediately loses all content with it. They win once and know that they “could” win more if they keep going. They continue to gamble in hopes of gaining more money. Gambling and content are just about as far apart as you can possibly go. Swap gambling with dating apps and the logic is just as consistent. An individual gets on a dating app with the hopes of finding just one romantic partner they click with. Once they find that connection, they’ll delete it. They are happy to finally have someone who is romantic and respectful. What happens? Just like a gambler in Vegas, they always know there could possibly be someone even more attractive or with an even deeper connection if they keep swiping. In the back of their minds, this thought always pulls on their peace.

Is your happiness not important? What’s the point of dating if you will never find peace in someone? The logic behind happiness is to discover it alone, then add someone else on top of what you’ve already created. By doing this you can reach a higher level of emotional well-being. The only justification I toss out on the table, is to those who only want sex or validation. I suppose they could care less about content anyways, considering their logic runs the opposite direction from it. The millions of young adults who do actually want to align themselves with happiness must realize this issue and go into dating apps being tediously mindful of it. The reality is even if God gave us the perfect person to be with, people would never actually know this, and their thoughts would still continue to harass them to find someone “better”. I’m not saying to delete all your apps. What I am saying is to change your mind and the way it’s processing. Mindfulness simply means to be aware.

Now consider another issue that is counter to logic. The idea of attracted someone through sexual means and expecting an outcome of depth. For some illogical reason, people honestly believe physical beauty is the key to finding genuine connections. It’s as if they are trying to change the reality of nature to suit their desires.

Let’s consider the idea of a very attractive woman. Let’s say she is deeply intellectual, loving, trustworthy and hardworking. No blank is left uncheck regarding what a man would want in her. She desires a man of value. What is a man of value? Nothing more than a reflection of the beautiful characteristics she offers. But we have a serious issue here. She finds herself gaining quite a following of men via her social media, which she uses to subliminally show off her body. She has countless men commenting on her photos, putting emojis and Dming her. She has hundreds of men at her fingertip yet is unhappy and far from content. She gets a brief high from the validation only to constantly need another puff the following day. Every time she meets up with a man, he is either focused on sex or tries to take her “back home” after drinks. She’s having deep trouble finding any man of intellect who isn’t focused on her physical, but her mind. The confusion is frustrating and a poison to her happiness. We must accept reality for what it actually is. The reality is superficiality attracts superficiality. Even if her mind is beautiful, her body will always be the main focus of a man if it’s what she is using as the way to attract. What’s even more important to realize is even if her face is absolutely gorgeous, her body will still be an obsession to men if that’s the initial way she is attracting them. The power of lust to many men is like a drug addict is to a drug dealer, imagine trying to develop a connection with a drug addict if he knew you had his drug? The sooner a woman can realize this the sooner she will find deeper connections and masculine valuable men.

Men are not void of the same exact issue. Men’s ideas of physical beauty are muscles and abs. Most guys just say “aesthetics”. The reality is tossed on men too. If a man attracts a woman because of his body, he will be attracting women who are superficial and lack depth. How does he miraculously expect a woman of depth to see “abs” and run to him? Not only is this ridiculous, but a woman of depth will not even be impressed by a nice body. What makes this logic hard to distinguish is an attractive fit man will most definitely attract pretty women. But what good is that if she is there because of your body only? what about your mind? your intellect? What about the characteristics of you that actually make you, you?

I think we have to comprehend what we are doing and if it’s aligning ourselves up with success. The goal is to optimize our chances at success. Also consider the alternative if we do commit into a relationship based off our bodies: it would be a relationship filled with anxiety, insecurity and validation. Being alone will always be far less toxic and peaceful then being in a superficial relationship. The reality is if you attract someone with your body, you are only one injury away from losing that person’s interest. There will always be someone better looking than you. Being with a superficial person will have you always subtly knowing that you’re not good enough for that person if you aren’t always at your very best. It’s like walking on a tightrope and if you slip it’s all over. Why would you sign up for such pressure and added stress? Is not the whole purpose for a relationship to add to your happiness, not create a new world of anxiety?

Take good mental notes here. My goals aren’t to give you all the answers to issues but to help you comprehend the reality of the world and situations. Logic is something so easily understood but seemingly difficult to be mindful of. Logic is like the elephant in the room, something we all know is there, but we cover it up and get busy. As soon as someone walks over, uncovers it, we see that elephant again, staring at us and we know it’s there. Logic is stationary. Logic is the reality of life. Logic doesn’t care about your feelings. Logic ignores emotion and hugs happiness. Happiness is founded in logic because logic is reality.

If social media influencers collectively, started wearing paper bags on their heads as a new form of attire, millions of people would flirt with the idea of doing the same. Of course, this sounds ridiculous, yet the reality is many people would gladly hop onto the new trend. Think, for a moment, the amount of power society has over each and every one of us. Peer pressure is something we are all very aware of, yet many fall victim to this. Rather it be from just a small circle of friends or society as a whole, social acceptance will cause rationally minded, logical people to do ridiculous things. Our fear of not being socially accepted overrides our happiness and emotional well-being.

Consider with me the idea of toxicity. It’s viewed as trendy to many, rather they want to admit it or not. Many people say that it’s all just a satire, not meant to be taken seriously. I argue that what may have at one point been a joke has turned into a craving, for many. Objectively speaking, we must be logical here. Happiness and instability do not hold hands…ever. Happiness is calm, peaceful and consistent. Consistent as in it’s not all over the place, running to a high for its foundation. Its foundation is firm and strong. Toxic is instable, needing a constant high to survive. Toxicity is not happiness; it could definitely be the poison to it though.

Why is toxicity viewed as cool to many? Well, for starters, society views it this way. Social media subtly whispers to our minds without us even realizing it. Just a quick scroll down TikTok and we can see the countless satire pages glorifying toxicity. Jump on Facebook or Instagram and memes make us laugh, thus connecting us emotionally. This in return, causes many to crave the irrational waters of negativity. If toxic was viewed as embarrassing and sad, would it be such a craving for so many people? Imagine if toxic was viewed cringey and weird? If this was honestly the case, it wouldn’t be what it is today. Society’s influence is the ultimate mouthpiece to this. People will lose their own morals and standards to be trendy.

The second reason: toxicity is like a drug. An individual’s emotions bounce around like a ping pong machine. Imagine all the emotions you feel from a nasty argument, the period of distance after and then making up. After a dramatic fight, you only hope that you get back with the one you “love”, anxious and stressed they might leave. When you “make up” after a big fight this is a shot of dopamine to your brain. In a most literal sense, this is what happens. People get caught in a cycle of downs, deeply needing that high to feel normal. Consider a toxic lover like a drug, because in reality both drugs and toxic relationships both have dopamine hits and crashes.

Our society is like your favorite candy, sweet and tasty only to leave your body with less nutrition and minerals. Imagine eating fast-food and candy every day simply because it tastes good? That the instant pleasure is your foundation? Anything that gives you any form of instant gratification typically comes with side effects. Interestingly enough, most things in life that feel good in the moment are actually not adding to joy in the long run. Reality has a funny way of making things that actually contribute to our happiness less noticeable. Typically, what matters to each and every one of us are close family, friends and special moments. Not one of these three are a “high”, yet they are the foundation to your happiness. Become extremely introverted to instant gratification. Deeply consider what it is and if it’s adding to your emotional well-being. take note.

Scientists, right now as I type, are completely baffled by our consciousness. One would think that scientists have our minds figured out by now…when in fact, we have absolutely no clue about it. It’s not even that science has confidence in what our consciousness is, they are lost as much as you are on what it is. Your idea of what it is, could be just as accurate as a top neuroscientist, in the present day. Even the few ideas of what it is are debatable and chippy. The reality is science as a whole knows far more about distant galaxies then they do about human consciousness.

Where does our thoughts come from? Consider that every moment of every day you are constantly having thoughts “appear” in your mind. Where do they come from? Who is the mastermind behind tossing these thoughts into your mind? Is it you? But then, what are you? Consider that we have no control over what thoughts appear in our minds either, which makes matters even more confusing. It’s as if our minds actually do have a mind of their own, if that makes sense. When a thought comes into our mind it seemingly comes from nothing. How does something appear from nothing?

To make matters even more interesting, not only do we not know what our consciousness is, but we also have no idea how it originated. How does a “consciousness” randomly just appear on earth? How does an organism, with specific subjective thoughts, pop up into reality? Think about it, something so astronomically advanced as the human mind suddenly appeared at some point in the past, which is baffling. If you say “evolution”, then you’re just as much burdened with this same exact question. At what point did consciousness oddly just appear into our ancestors?

The mind is completely abstract. For instance, you cannot see your consciousness or feel it. You can only experience it. If one looks at a brain, all they see is an unaesthetic…blob. If you dig deeper into it, you will find hundreds of billions of neurons all working collectively to keep you alive and functioning. Consider that this in no way shows us, consciousness though. From what scientists see, there is nothing in the brain that is evidence of consciousness. No scientific method can see, feel or study it, therefore if we weren’t experiencing for ourselves, we would have a solid case that it doesn’t exist. If anything, our consciousness, in an odd way, laughs at science.

If our own consciousness is entirely abstract, then how are we so quick to toss out the idea of a soul? A soul of course cannot be seen felt or studied either. It would be spot on with what a consciousness is. An abstract part of existence. Just as much as a scientist would ignore the idea of a soul, they would also ignore the idea of a consciousness if it wasn’t for it being such a blatantly obvious reality. Interesting how there are such fundamental abstract realities that produce and maintain this existence. Even numbers are completely abstract. Some of the most vital parts of existence cannot be seen.

This also leads to another question. with advanced Artificial intelligence, at what point do we consider their robotic activities as “consciousness”? At what point would it be Immoral to pull the plug on a robot? As ridiculous as it sounds, think about this. The scientific community argue on what consciousness is, so how are they supposed to know at what point that a robot would be conscious? Considering that, at the rate we are going with robots, they will far surpass human intelligence, would they not be conscious at some point?

Each and every single soul on this earth has their own subjective experience. Our minds are so specific to us that we can witness the exact same events or things but have entirely different experiences. If you add up all the neurons in your brain with its connectors (synapses), you have as much as stars in the Milky way. Think about it…we have billions of people walking the earth right now, each with a milky way galaxy of components, all just in their brains. How fascinating is that? To say we can even comprehend the sheer numbers we are dealing with is a lie. All we can do is accept reality as marvelous and amazing.

You’re off on your fourth date with the person you’ve been deeply infatuated with. You’re at a table, talking about various things, from philosophy to sports. Your face is plastered with a big smile and laughs are the only sound you hear. All your stresses, anxieties and burdens are non-existent.

As you sit and chat, someone opens the door and walks in. They are extremely attractive, model material. They are fit, confident and carry a presence with them. Whatever mental perfection you would create of a person, is walking right past you. To say you’re not insecure at all would be a lie.

Now consider something in this moment: The way the individual in front of you responds in this situation is worthy of deep thought. As you talk to them, what happens? You know who just walked in as much as they know. Are they still obsessed with your thoughts and mind? Are they unbothered and deeply focused on your smile still? Is the way they react the same it would be if no one walked in at all?

Or do you find yourself feeling even more insecure by their immediate lack of focus? Do they stare? Are they clearly not in that moment with you anymore? Do they constantly glance over at that individual? Consider that their reaction to this is a great way to determine the reality of that individual’s attachment to superficiality.

Of course, this can easily be viewed as over generalization, but the reality is this moment is authentic and subtle. Nothing will probably come of this; you will keep talking to them and the day will proceed. But this has meaning. The quiet moments such as this are only a small piece of something much deeper. Always pay attention to even small details, especially as you get to know an individual.

To be blunt: if someone is superficial, do not even get involved. You are creating your own inevitable failure. Why invest into something that will not last? The world gravitates to social status, money and looks. These are the adult candy people crave. The problem is once they get that candy, they only want another piece. People who are on strings to the world create their own unhappiness. They are never actually satisfied in a relationship because they are always, in the back of their minds, trying to find the next person to commit to in hopes of a more powerful high. They get bored in their relationships and find themselves breaking their own morals because of their deep desire for the world. They justify their bad actions, find ways to short end the ones they’re with and have an ego that’s blown up like a balloon. If you get involved with them, you are setting sail in stormy, dangerous waters. Be prepared for more overthinking, anxiety and insecurity. If anything, these type people will magnify every issue you already have. If this isn’t enough…it’s a complete waste of your valuable time. It will fail.

Then we have those who are not superficial. Those who are fully invested into romance and love. These are the individuals who deeply value intellect, communication and depth. The difference between these people and the ones above is simple: They comprehend what a happy relationship actually is, not what society tries to tell them. These individuals are never impressed by nice bodies, pretty smiles and money. They value good communication, hard work and trust. They have their own personal goals, but they also comprehend the balance in sacrifice. Even if the sacrifice seems ridiculous in their eyes…they see its purpose. They comprehend that a relationship is constant effort and needs to be watered daily. They never have a blown-up ego towards their partners. They don’t have a “if they can’t handle me, they can leave” attitude but a calm, peaceful comprehension of sacrificial balance.

Your happiness ultimately rests on the person you choose to be with. Consider your happiness to be a glass cup and you’re handing it over to the person you allow in your life. It is a very fragile glass; you protect it at all costs but allow that person to take it from you. Every bit of happiness you experience in life rests with this little glass cup. Is the person you’re handing your cup to able to protect it as much as you do?

In a toxic society full of people who simply don’t understand what happiness actually is, only allow people who are truly obsessed with your mind into your life. Too often people are overly concerned with their bodies, income and status that they toss their own beautiful minds into the backseat like a fast-food wrapper. Do me a mental favor, imagine for a moment the difficulty in being a famous celebrity. You’re rich and attractive, complete with social status to easily get whatever you desire. Sounds amazing, right? well consider that with all of this comes the fact that you will never actually know if someone is with you for you or for your money and social status. In a sense this forever cloaks your ability to know who is authentic and who’s not. What a curse? To finally achieve such success only to be blind to who is real? The blessing me and you have is we’re not celebrities, so we can attract others with depth. If we play our cards right, we can truly know who we are dealing with. Don’t attract through your body, money or status…this creates your own distractions and cloaks your ability to distinguish authenticity. Consider making your mind your greatest value that you offer to others. Out of all the amazing things that you bring to the table, make your beautiful mind number one on that list. By doing this, you can truly know that others will only want you for you, not for the number of digits in your bank account or appearance.

Happiness is quiet. It is not loud or fancy. Happiness is simple. it loves to be behind the scenes, like a lone wolf. Happiness never attempts to one up anyone or anything, it simply exists. Happiness is peaceful and content…like a slow river running through a beautiful mountain valley. Happiness is always in a direct contradiction to society, becoming its polar opposite.

Be happy.

Dear Z,

You opened this page out of curiosity. You just wanted to skim over this, probably as quickly as possible, didn’t you? You’re reading this, so you got this far. If I were a genie and told you that in exchange for ten minutes of your time I would in return hand over information that would stick with you for the rest of your life, would you do it? Consider me a genie, then.

I always question how the encounter would go if I had the opportunity to sit down with my teenage self. The eighteen-year-old Jarom would be nervously looking down as I spoke to him. He couldn’t possibly maintain confident eye contact. He was a shy young man, very deep into religion and ignorant of the world. Unfocused in high school but still somewhat content. The most important thing in his life was basketball and the next Lloyd banks album. His reality was ignorance. He only knew it through music, movies and television.

In many ways you guys symbolize the eighteen-year-old Jarom. Of course, some of you are far past who I was at eighteen…but I feel many people at your age struggle with the same issues no matter what decade it is. Technology and society have evolved but ultimately, humans are the same now as we were five hundred years ago. We all feel pain, fear and anxiety. Young adults stress their reputations and social status tediously. Many people are on the receiving end of bullying. Has this ever not happened since mankind has existed?

I want you to know that I truly feel that I have a firm comprehension of your struggles and issues. I use social media partly to see what the world is evolving to. To witness with my own eyes the reality of Gen z’s problems. I don’t want to come across as that annoying adult who tries to understand but always falls short of comprehension. I truly feel that most of the points I’m going to bring up are universal and deeply beneficial independent of what age you are. The only reason I stress this on you is because you’re still young and have the potential for a long life. I want you to maximize every last drop of happiness in this existence. Consider that the following ideas are the gateway to mental freedom and happiness.

1. You attract what you give. If you sexualize yourself people will only want to have sex with you. Nature doesn’t care about your feelings on the matter. You can listen to as many TikTok videos as you want about physical freedom, sexual liberation and agree with what society says all you want. Doesn’t matter. Society wants you to believe in something because it’s what it wishes was true… not what is actually true. The issue people are now having is they sexualize themselves while simultaneously wanting a solid romantic partner. This is a monumental issue and contradiction that will leave you confused and upset. People will live their whole lives trying to do both of these things and constantly failing. Choose your desires and put forth the actions and ideas necessary to find the end goal to them.
2. This life is your book, and every page is blank. Don’t want to go to college? Don’t. Don’t want to buy a house? Don’t. The idea of marriage isn’t sitting right? Don’t do it then. Want to stop your entire career midway and start something random? Do it. Stop viewing life as school, work, then marriage etc… Life is not preprogrammed. In fact, take pride in doing whatever you want. Life is a customizable program. View life as a thick book. It’s only your book, and no one holds the pen except for you. You’re writing out this book each and every day you wake up in the morning. Each chapter is your choice. Remember that every time you turn that page…it’s always going to be completely blank. Too often people give their pen away or allow other people to write on their pages.
3. Social media will make you feel worse about yourself. Imagine you step onto a basketball court with all strangers. You have a deep level of pride in your skill set and rarely ever lose. Game starts. Ball checks in. within seconds you find yourself getting physically and mentally destroyed. They are dunking, crossing you over and scoring on you as if you aren’t even in their way. No matter how hard you try, you continually fail to have any impact in the game. After the suffering is over you drive home never wanting to ball again. Your pride is gasping for air and the discouragement is overwhelming. Few days pass. You turn on the news and discover that the game you were involved in consisted of all NBA players. Now swap out NBA players here with social media models and fitness influencers and the logic is the exact same. You are literally scrolling down your feed looking at the absolute Best-looking people in the world and comparing yourself to them. This is a certain form of mental suffering. Comprehend the reality of what social media actually is. One walk down Walmart and what do you see? screaming children, stressed parents and hardworking people all trying to make ends meet. that is reality. Always know that if you gamble by using social media the negative aspect will always push on your thoughts if you aren’t comprehending actual reality. take note.
4. Your happiness rests on how well you can control your emotions. Your emotions determine your overall happiness. It’s the foundation. If you can master this concept and act on it, you already have reduced dramatically any chances of drama, negativity or problems in your life. People literally create their own problems by being a peasant to their own emotions. Work-out your brain as much as you work-out your body. Start now. this is so deeply vital.
5. Ignore validation. Become numb to it. If you are the last person on earth doing something, do it. Don’t tie yourself down by trying to maintain a certain look or reputation. This connects with my second point. Do what you want, when you want without validation or compliments from others. Consider that anyone in life who was ever original or started a trend was the first person to do it. They took the risk of negative reactions. Never hesitate to act on an idea because of social acceptance. Even if you act on a decision alone and no one cares guess what? You’re free. Mental liberation is peaceful.
6. dating has turned into a philosophical world of toxic masculinity vs toxic feminism. Both are wrong. thousands of “dating coaches” are in a constant philosophical battle on how dating should be. People are making money off a concept that should not be confusing. Dating and commitments should never be complicated or deeply philosophical. Simplicity is the foundation to any good thing in life. Consider these truths regarding romance: Trust, effort and communication are basics to any success regarding any commitment. Base all your actions and words off of this foundation. Men, continue to be chivalrous, and women open your arms and value that. Embrace a man who opens doors, buys small gifts and treats you well. Allow the man to excel in his masculine role and your feminine nature will always be the puzzle piece that he is missing. Remember to Always reciprocate what the other person gives…never speed up or slowdown from the pace they go. Be very mindful of this reciprocation. This will be your tool to determine if your value is staying high in the eyes of the one you love.
7. Love your parents. As you age, you’ll find yourself needing the warmth and love from your parents as you did as a child. It’s a complete circle. You’re going through a stage in life where your mind is infatuated with schoolwork, dating and social media. Toss a few drunk nights out on top of it all and the last thing on your mind is your parents’ advice or love for you. You mentally roll your eyes to their failing attempts at understanding you. But consider that We can be so engulfed in routine that we detach ourselves from the actual value of deep loving relationships with good people. I can promise you that there where be a day when all that will change. You will deeply reminisce their love for you and want to see them more as they grow old. The comprehension of how fragile life is will increase as you continue to live your life. Consider changing your thoughts to where you’re not going through any mental voids regarding the ones who brought your life to be.
8. Overthinking will ruin your life. Overthinking…the sacred art of staying up until 3am deeply obsessing over a conversation from a month ago. We all can hold hands universally of being victim to this. Where we allow our minds to have a mind of its own. In other words, we have no control over our thoughts, so we just allow them to flow any way they please. You can’t overthink your way into a better life. Not finding an answer to this issue will lead to an anxious overly stressed life filled with hypothetical scenarios that will never even happen. It will lead to restless nights and irritable mornings. The moment will never be connected with as you swim right past it. The reality is we can find ways to prevent this from happening. I strongly recommend for you to look into meditation and mindfulness. One can’t change something they can’t discover. You must know your thoughts and recognize when they appear.
9. Your body is and always will be enough. Both young men and young women are facing a full onslaught towards their securities. If I was a betting man, I’d toss all my dice on the idea that it’s far worse now than ever in history. Even the most attractive, athletic and successful individuals you know has them. Social media only magnifies internal issues like this to massive proportions. It creates this virtual standard of how you should look. Men should be a certain height, weight and make six figures. Women should be curvy. Tight waist and somehow magically always look young. What you must realize is that social media is lying to you. You are enough and always will be. Ignore the false ideas and standards social media whispers in your ear. Hear me out Gen z. You will always be enough. Consider this pleasant reality… No matter how you look, you are always someone’s preference. While you’re looking in the mirror stressed over your insecurities there is someone at that same moment who would actually selectively choose you based off their personal attractions.

People go their entire lives obsessively working for money, fame and social status only to die leaving all of it behind. The empty house they owned gets auctioned off, Clothing gets sent to charity and money gets distributed to other people. The value of life lies Soley on building deep relationships, comprehending the moment and following your passions. When you’re lying on your deathbed, the last thing on your mind will be your car, house or how many followers you have. You will only be thinking about your family and special memories.

Gen Z you are the generation that will run society and technology in the future. You also are the generation under me, and I value you like I would a younger brother or sister. I’m not trying to reinvent the wheel in this letter but only trying to pass along what I know to be true. Do me a big favor. Consider your happiness.

sincerely,

Jarom

The simple fact that me and you exist right now is virtually a miracle.

Consider just the absurd number of things that needed to perfectly align in the universe to allow life to even begin. The chances of the world being produced with all the matter collectively working together is so astronomical it’s flirting with impossibility.

Consider that mankind has been around for hundreds of thousands of years and only up until the past one hundred fifty years did cars, planes, electricity, phones, television and internet exist. This thought alone is absolutely mind blowing. let me say it again. 200,000 years and only the last 150 years did we get what we know today. This means me and you had a (roughly) .08 percent of being here in this most advanced society. Over a 99 percent chance that we landed somewhere else in the timeline of mankind…but we landed here. We are the end result of hundreds of thousands of years of technology. Thousands upon thousands of failed experimentations and restless nights from obsessed scientists to become what we are today. If someone from only as far back as the nineteenth century were to see what we have become today he would be living in a fairy tale. A surreal dream only in his imagination. Our society is far more impressive then flying cars. We have almost infinite information in the palm of our hands at any time. We have social networking to video chat with anyone in seconds. We have technology that can stabilize mental illness and cures for countless diseases. We are already creating A.I that can produce information quicker than hundreds of Albert Einstein’s crammed into one. We are on course to create machines that can fully function and process without any human intervention.

Consider that eighty percent of the world’s population is currently living on less than ten dollars a day. If you’re reading this and are in a first world country, consider yourself rich. In all respects, it doesn’t matter in the slightest if you’re struggling to pay bills, if you’re working minimum wage or in a small apartment with no room. You’re a king or queen compared to the rest of the world. There simply is no way to compare our lives to the rest of the world without seeing a dramatic difference. We are, by pure existence, sitting at the very top of the world in conveniences. Most of us including myself will live and die without having a clear comprehension of how luxurious our lives are to so many billions of other individuals.

Consider that your mind is unique to only you. Your consciousness is the only one that has ever existed or will ever exist. The hundreds upon hundreds of billions of people who live before you, who live now and who will live will never have your exact thoughts and subjective experiences. This is such an absurd thought. You are so incredibly valuable. The value of something is based off the scarcity of it. You are one in most likely trillions (if you add the future of mankind). The scarcity of your specific consciousness makes even the rarest diamond on earth seem cheap. Each and every one of us has by logic itself…incomprehensible value.

By simply looking in the mirror you can witness for yourself a walking miracle. Our existence is beautiful.