The Great Ethical Dilemma: Relationships and Standards

You finally meet the man of your dreams.

Finding him was impossible…until it wasn’t. He is everything you could have asked for…your checklist has no empty spots. It isn’t just his looks, but also his ability to communicate and his intelligence.

As always, you have your emotional guard up. This time around though, it seems to be dropping far more rapidly than usual. He seems to say all the right things at the right time. The cold heart you handed him has begun the process of defrosting.

After several months of deep conversations and fun dates…you commit to him. A few days after your fairy tale beginning…a conversation comes up unexpectedly.

The smile falls off your face as soon as you hear it…“I do not want you to go off to clubs”.

This comes as a shock to you. No man in your life has ever cared about you going off…enjoying life (as you should). Your girlfriends all have boyfriends…and they seemingly could care less about it. The social circle you’ve created would immediately see this “perfect” man as a screaming red flag.

Your whole life has been filled with beautiful (at times chaotic) moments with your rowdy friends. The theme of your life is to be in the moment, to party hard but work hard. This sudden contradiction in ideas is a sucker punch to your excitement.

“Why does it matter to you if I go have fun? You already seem controlling.” The passive reply from your mouth is full of offense and dissatisfaction. The butterflies you felt were hit by a fly swatter and left for dead.

“I’ve never had a woman go off to clubs and I cannot believe this is an issue for you” is his firm reply back.

You hang up on him, hop on TIKTOK and watch as many bias videos as you can in regard to justification for this issue of yours. By the end of the night, you’re certain that he is a control freak and a narcissist. The idea of breaking it off has already begun and you’ve just started.

My opinion is right…yours is…wrong?

What started off as a cute conversation between to love birds has now turned into an ethical dilemma: Who is right when both parties create their own subjective standards for their relationship?

One of the biggest flaws within relationships is that of standards. We all have developed our own personal set of standards for ourselves and our relationships. What we deem to be fine to do in a commitment is very much personal for each one of us. To counter this, we also have certain matters we set that are wrong and unethical to do within a commitment. Ultimately, many commitments are swamped with anxiety, anger and resent from this conflict of interest. Ethics are already a sensitive subject…and two parties finding mutual agreement on them can skyrocket into many negative emotions. For many, negative emotions are just the nails being put into a coffin slowly…the end of their relationship is inevitably going to happen.

Subjective means varying, changing and not firmly set. If you are using the word subjective in regard to people…than whatever you are referring to would be dependent on each and every individual. A good example of subjectivity in humans is opinions. We all have opinions on different matters, and for the most part we are all valid in them. If I like pizza with no cheese, call me weird but I’m just as much valid as someone who likes extra cheese on their pizza. If I love pineapples on my pizza and you don’t…we both are right. I cannot tell you that disliking pineapples on your pizza is wrong, and if I did you would call me unethical and wrong. (as you should).

Let’s drag subjectivity over to our commitments and our standards within them. It’s no different than our favorite flavor of ice-cream. My set of standards are just as valid as yours. In the example above, the woman (I used you, the reader) is no more right or wrong than the man is in regard to the situation. If he says she shouldn’t go to clubs, he is right. If she says she should be able to…she is right. They are both right. They both have their subjective reasons based off their social circles and life experiences.

This creates an ethical dilemma, one that, if not fixed…can destroy a relationship.

The only way for two parties to come together and make sense of this would be to somehow find an objective standard somewhere, one that is firmly set and accurate. Since science cannot solve any ethical problems, there is no scientific peer review you can find that could possibly prove what objective standard is right for any commitment. Science has its hands tied on anything ethical…logic and microscopes do nothing within the world of abstract values such as these.

Whatever would create these objective truths would be something outside this realm. Something that would be outside logic, physics, time and space. In order to present anything ethical as factual for our commitments…it could not use science as its source.

If we all had one source of factual standards somewhere to go to, it wouldn’t matter what they felt or thought on something…they would know that following the objective standard is the only right way. What this would mean in regard to the club dilemma above is that one of these individuals would be factually correct and the other…factually wrong. Therefore, they could both look to this objective standard for assistance in these matters.

What could I possibly be talking about here?

You’re smart, I know you can figure this one out.

-Jarom

And He Said Unto Them “Why Are Ye So Fearful? How is it That Ye Have No Faith?”

Everyday our thoughts stick a thorn in our peace as we constantly obsess over matters that don’t even exist…except in our minds. We have deep bouts of anxiety about all the “what ifs” in the unknown future. We question our lives. We compare ourselves to others on social media…a losing battle that will never be won. Human beings are filled with fear, anxiety and insecurity. We all hold hands on suffering…emotionally, mentally and physically. Some will wake up tomorrow to hear dreadful news from their doctor. Others will go to sleep tonight in tears from being cheated on. Many lose loved ones…unexpectedly. Suffering is as normal a part of life as the air we breathe.

Many suffer from horrible addictions that feel impossible to overcome. Rather it be pornography or a sinister drug, our lives are always only one puff, drink or click away from a deep dark hole. It ruins so many…a prison that can bring even the strongest individuals down. Independent of any “sin”, even the most radical atheists can see the destruction of addiction. It is part of reality, no matter your worldview.

Individuals, every day, wake up fearing what “might” happen, afraid of their abilities to get something done or supporting their families. People are afraid. Society is a collection of millions of people who are afraid. No matter how confident someone is, how much money they have, fear is always whispering to their consciousness. The mask people wear is taken off when they are alone. It is laid away until the next social media post or public appearance. No matter what, that mask is never forgotten as they walk out the door.

2000 years ago, on the sea of Galilee, a few good men doubted a God. They were filled with deep bouts of anxiety and fear as their boat tossed in the dark ocean. The storm they were under was causing even the most faithful men to scream in horror to their leader, who was sleeping. They fearfully yelled “Master, carest thou not that we perish? “In other words, the master they were so deeply invested in became nothing more than another human, in this moment. All the beautiful things Jesus did prior was completely ignored. In this moment, they looked at God in the face and doubted him. They doubted all he had told them. They doubted Their missions and their leaders’ missions. They chose fear over faith. Their faith was non-existent as they anxiously yelled for help. Ultimately, their minds totally forgot about the spirit he had gave them…it didn’t exist in their minds as the waves clashed against their boat.

As many of us know, Jesus woke up and stopped the nightmare around them. The disciples watched in shock as the clouds faded into a beautiful sky. He questioned why they doubted…like a disappointed parent.

Many could easily look at this story and shake their heads at the disciples. What was wrong with them? To actually be with Jesus and still doubt? How is that even possible? In our minds we think about how amazing it would be to see Jesus, to feel his hugs and walk with him…as if we somehow would be different than they were. As if we would react so differently. My friends, we are no different and we prove this almost daily. You prove it daily. I prove it daily. We are like a bunch of terrified disciples questioning God all the time…fearing what might happen. We say we have faith…while simultaneously fearing the unknown. We fear when we act on Gods words…considering all the terrible possibilities that could happen if it falls through. We fear of embarrassment. Of slander. We fear of physical pain and death. We fear of being cheated on. Our insecurities claw on our consciousness, never giving many a break. We try to control things we have no control over…as if thinking something enough can change reality. The list goes on and on.

I ask myself, if I were on that same boat 2000 years ago, what would I have done? Would I have stood strong and patiently waited in the corner as my friends woke Jesus? To say this bluntly: No. I can confirm with confidence that I would have been right there with the disciples. I would have been afraid as the boat rocked under the lightning and thunder. I would have been afraid and dreadfully anxious. How do I know this? Because I doubt God at times. My faith is far from whole. Even when I think my faith is strong, I realize in a moment’s notice it’s fragile as glass from my chaotic mind.

How often do we hold on, both hands still gripping, afraid to let go? How often do we say we have both feet in with Christ, but we actually have one still out “just in case?”

How often are people fearful to attack their addictions because it feels impossible? How often do we fear embarrassment from society, for Christ? How often are people harassed by their insecurity, telling themselves they are worthless? How often do people choose pleasures over God, rejecting the knowledge of a perfect being? That somehow, he might not come through, maybe sex, drugs, status and money actually is happiness? Maybe God isn’t real, I’m just not experiencing life fully. How often does this happen? If we are so confident in Jesus, he must ask us…”how is it that ye have no faith?”

JESUS THE CHRIST: HE IS REAL

I know Christ is real. He lives. He is my savior, he is yours. He is an atheist’s savior, if they so choose to accept him. He is the savior to every individual who has ever lived, who lives now and who will live. A perfect God came down to earth 2000 year ago to suffer the greatest pain imaginable to people who hated him and still do. The same people who spit on him and handed him vinegar to drink were the same people he loved beyond human comprehension. He was charity in the flesh…and is now charity on a throne. I don’t care who you are, how stupid and disgusting you feel, he loves you like an obsessed parent. All the horror in mankind, the suffering that is far too radical for our minds to grasp, is fully comprehendible to Christ, having felt every moment of fear and pain in human existence. All the horrible accidents, mental illness, executions, domestic abuse, bouts of profound embarrassment and social destruction…not a tear has been shed in all human existence which Jesus the Christ didn’t experience himself.

It’s time. If you read this far, I’m your push to just do it. You know Christ is real…so now you can let go. You have to act now. Put both feet in with Christ. Roll all your dice. Lay all your cards out in front of you, without question. Put your arms out wide and fall back. Stop questioning. Stop looking back.

To a heartbroken Jarius, whose daughter had just passed away…our savior pronounced,

“Be not afraid, only believe.”

He then proceeded to raise his daughter from the dead. What beautiful miracles await you?

He lives-

Jarom

The Dream

You wake up, distorted and confused. Bright light from the sun above shines into your squinted eyes as you look around for your location. You’re high above the ground on what looks like a beautiful mountain. The blue skies ignore any clouds as the sun takes full advantage to warm your skin.

You look over to see an individual sitting next to you…It’s Jesus. The one whom you’ve obsessively thought about so many lonely nights and drives to work. The one whom you trusted in your previous life without ever seeing.

He hugs you closely and firmly. You realize that you know him. He looks exactly like what you thought. Like a family member whom you go home to every day, there is nothing about him that is unrecognizable.

After the long hug, you attempt to stand up out of respect. Jesus responds to your movement quickly “I’m glad you’re here! It’s ok, I truly appreciate your love, but in this moment let’s just watch this beautiful sky together.” You immediately sit down like a nervous child to a parent. You can’t stop smiling. Not only do you see him, but you feel him. You’re in shock…but blissfully happy.

“Jesus! I honestly can’t even comprehend that you’re…here. I’m actually here with you. Finally.” Energetically Jesus responds “I know! I am beyond happy. I’m so fulfilled that you’re here, sitting next to me, in this moment. I’ve been cheering you on and paying attention to your growth with me.”

“Really? I never doubted you Jesus. Well…maybe a little, but only a few times in my past life. I apologize Jesus, I realized that my past life was entirely meant to be confusing in some ways and beautiful in other ways. You know me more than I know myself, sometimes I was my own worst enemy.”

you’re simultaneously pondering back on your life, on all the times you experienced in relation to Jesus. The number of questions on your mind is tremendous. You remember one monumental time when you really doubted Jesus. “Jesus, remember when I was going through that transition stage in my life? new city and I felt super alone?” Jesus smiling, replies ” Yes I know exactly what you’re referring to.”

During that time, everyone I trusted turned their back on me. I had no one. The few people I did fully trust turned around on me and walked away. It was during this time when I questioned if even God would leave me. Remember? I’m sure you know already”

“Yes I know exactly the seconds, hours and days you’re referring to. Every last sprinkle of trust you had in everyone was lost. The few people you actually did trust disappeared. It created deep subconscious issues for you, enough for you to even ask if God would do the same.”

“Yes Jesus! I’m so sorry, it was wrong. Jesus it really messed my mind up, I was truly not right in those days. It’s just that…you start to really question everything when such deep issues happen over and over again. I felt the only person I could look to was the reflection in the mirror and nothing else. It was a hell in itself you could say. I needed someone, but no one was there.”

“I know, quite literally, what you mean. There was a certain time when I was on earth too, and I felt similar to you. I walked the streets of Galilee and Jerusalem long before your time on earth, only to be ignored and looked at as someone who’s not right mentally. I had few I trusted in on earth and more than one turned their backs completely on me. It was difficult being on that cross alone, to feel the nails in my hands and feet. Even I had to question for a few seconds on that cross why I’m alone.”

“Wow. Jesus I cannot even begin to imagine your strength. You are my everything, my savior and light Jesus. I need you. So when you were on the cross and asked why you were forsaken, you truly felt that way?”

Smiling Jesus replies “yes. Even me, a God felt the icy cold feeling of being entirely alone. Of being looked at as evil. Of being weird and socially unacceptable. Yet, I never once doubted myself. I knew my goal and I was going to accomplish it. One more important note here, I also felt your pains and sorrows. In that garden on earth, I felt everyone’s heartaches, deaths and anxieties. Not a bad feeling goes by in your life that I also didn’t feel. When you look at that sad reflection, feeling so deeply alone, remember I did the same. I lived your life.”

“Jesus what do you mean? Lived my life? Like literally? But Jesus I have certain physical issues that were extremely unique to me. My mental health was at times far too difficult for most to understand.”

“Yes. I lived every second of your life. I was walking with you every day of your life, experiencing all you felt also. I know what you felt. This is not an act of faith on my end, it literally happened. There was not a grumpy morning, flat tire, anxious thought or depressed night that I did not feel with you. All your anger, resent and sadness was fully felt by me as I strolled along your life with you. You chose for us on earth, I was always on the receiving end of your decisions.”

“What? no way! Now I feel terrible! So many bad decisions you had to feel. I’m so sorry. I can’t even begin to pay you back. What have I done Jesus? I carried you through all of that. So, this means you did the same for every human who ever lived?”

“Yes. Every child who passed in poverty, victim of wars and accidents. Whatever horrible suffering you imagine in your mind, I lived that life with that individual. I was simply accepting the pain in their lives fully. “

“Jesus? I love you!” Tears stream down your eyes as your intellect is tossed into shambles trying to grasp the moment. “Why did you do this? Like…I know that you died for me and you are the worlds savior, but you didn’t actually have to feel our exact pains and sorrows Jesus.”

Jesus sits smiling, looking out to the beautiful landscape. “I did it simply because I love you. I knew that you would feel alone. You would feel the bitterness of losing all trust in others. You would feel abandoned and neglected from all creatures. That’s why I came in. I chose to feel all your pains, to be your emotional punching bag…without you ever knowing it. I chose to feel your heartbreaks and fears. I chose to feel your anxieties and feeling of worthlessness. I chose to feel your deepest bouts of depression and anger. You were never alone. What this means is all your successes and joys were also felt by me, which in return brought me lots of smiles.”

Jesus still smiling continues “This is not a job interview or your regular one on one discussion like you hate. This isn’t a talk with a psychiatrist or psychologist. This isn’t your doctor talking or one of your friends who eventually left your life. This is someone who experienced every tear that dropped down your face. There is nothing you can possibly tell me that I’ve not felt myself, there is nothing you could tell me that I already don’t know. What’s so beautiful about this, is that even though trillions of people have lived on earth, your specific life experience was mine to feel. I love you.”

You can’t help but reach in for another long hug, but right when you do your eyes open as you look up at the clock. 2am. Your room is pitch black and the moonlight shines quietly through the window. “It was just a dream, only a nice dream.” A synergetic mix of sadness and peace overwhelms you as you lie back on your pillow. “If only that were real. I’d do anything to make that a reality.”

As you lie back on your bed pondering the beautiful dream you had, you receive a notification on your phone. Sluggishly you reach over to your phone and squint at the texts. It’s a friend needing advice on some trials they are experiencing. Not a close friend, but more of someone you know. Nevertheless, they want your help. They let you know about fears for an upcoming test, one that you’ve already taken and passed.

You smile wide as tears form in your squinting eyes. Not only did you pass that test, but you also know how it feels to be scared to take it. You realize that comprehending their fears allows you to help in such a way no one else can.

-Jarom

“

Consider The Lilies

When is the last time you were without your phone for more than an hour? When is the last time you actually chose to stop and look at the stars, instead of running to social media or Netflix? When is the last time you ignored your obligations to observe a squirrel running around the trees?

We as humans tend to have this attractive expectation that we’ll live to be a hundred…to experience a long life. We see ourselves with grandchildren and great grandchildren, waiting for family thanksgivings and gatherings. Simultaneously, we also nod our heads when someone says, “live each day like it’s your last,” knowing that reality really doesn’t care about our hopes. We tend to mentally stiff-arm the idea that at any given moment we could pass from this existence. We all know this is true, but subconsciously get lost into the most meaningless things. ridiculous drama, resent, our next vacation, unnecessary validation…the list is long. The reality is, many People who passed away felt they would live decades and decades longer, but the grim reaper had different plans. People leave this existence every minute of every day. Not a day goes by without the grim reaper making his rounds.

People argue with their spouses or lovers as they depart for the day, only to never get to say they’re sorry. Bullies find themselves clowning their targets one last time, feeling the horrific bouts of guilt as they discover they won’t have a target anymore. Loved ones get left on read as work duties take priority, which in return ends the last chance of communication in this life. There will always be a last time for all of us. We will all send one last text message. We will all make one last phone call. One last hug. One last drive home. One last social media post.

When we do leave this life, reality doesn’t care if it’s an expectation or second’s notice. Reality is harsh and unfair. It’s unemotional and rude. It doesn’t care about your next holiday or travels. It doesn’t care about your goodbyes or hugs. It comes when it wants.

My invitation to anyone who reads this, is to truly comprehend how beautiful this existence is. Even if you’re currently suffering, rather it be mental, emotional or physical…always remember that you’re still here. You’re alive…breathing and conscious. You’re a part of this weird experience we call “life.” How incredible is that?

Take time out of your stressful lives to be at one with reality. Let go of your chaotic thoughts and mental expectations. Watch the trees…observe the sky. Walking to your car at night isn’t without a beautiful visual of the space above. The darkness, filled with bright dots called stars, shouldn’t go unnoticed. Don’t let that bug crawl past you outside… stop and watch it. They have a purpose to fulfill in their littles worlds just like you have one in yours.

Let go of all your thoughts. Find a way to be in the moment only. Let go of all your stresses, fears, anxieties, hopes, thoughts…just be at one with being “human,” always be aware of this beautiful existence.

consider the lilies-

-Jarom

You Probably Don’t Grasp Just How Little Neuroscience Understands Consciousness

Clearing up some misconceptions people have of the current state of Neuroscience regarding human consciousness.

THEY ARE LOST (respectfully). Overall, neuroscience is light years from having any collective agreement on what it is, unless there is some random miraculous discovery sometime soon. Collectively, neuroscience has NO CLUE what the matter of consciousness is, where it is sourced from or WHY it even just randomly appears to begin with. It’s all philosophy and abstract rationale right now. Various theories that fight for first place with no one staying on top of the mountain very long. I’ve seen countless individuals lack comprehension of what science understands of this mystery so let me break it down below.

1. where it’s sourced from is not the same as explaining where it is housed in.

2. The consciousness is bound by the physical brain, no one argues this. If I lose a part of my brain of course that effects the consciousness, apart from this being blatantly obvious, science has proven through peer review that the consciousness is bound by the brain.

3. There is no collective answer in the slightest of anything of consciousness regarding its material, where it comes from or why it even randomly pops up from Neurons as opposed to other material. For example, why does consciousness appear only in a physical brain and not a piece of wood? Or a lung? As ridiculous as this sounds, it’s a valid mystery which is explained below.

4. The explanatory Gap is a well-known issue in the Philosophical world that science agrees with. This is the “mystery” of how a physical material gives rise to abstract “feeling” aka consciousness. There is a reason why this is a monumental debate, because it is completely unknown how this occurs. like…COMPLETELY unknown. it’s all theories and logic. NO EVIDENCE. There is no evidence, why? Because we don’t KNOW THE MATERIAL of consciousness and we would need to know it to some degree before knowing if it’s being sourced entirely from a physical neuron and not using the brain as a host. People use the “evidence” of how science knows what parts of the physical brain the consciousness is attached to and assume this is also explaining the source of consciousness which respectfully, is a causation fallacy. Simply saying we know that science confirms that the physical brain BOUNDS the consciousness is NOT giving a sprinkle of evidence that it is SOURCED from there. SOURCED means the neurons are producing the consciousness entirely themselves and we simply don’t know this until we actually understand the “Explanatory Gap.”

For anyone to shut the door on other realities is pure blind faith. I’ve read peer review papers that from the start are biased towards other realities…it stiff-arms the idea from the start. If there were other realities involved in this reality, then imagine closing the door to it and forcing a materialist study. This is called a waste of time.

Science needs to always keep their minds open and comprehend that we don’t know as much as we think we do, so keeping the door open to other realities is necessary at all times.

-Jarom

SCIENCE STEP YOUR GAME UP: HEAR ME OUT

Self-awareness?

Humans are self-aware. we receive self-awareness from anywhere between 3-5 years of age.
Whatever intelligence humans have between these ages are the intelligence necessary for self-awareness.
There are animals (Chimpanzee, Orangutan, Octopuses, Dolphins, etc…) That also reach the same intelligence as humans when we gain self-awareness. Some animals are extremely intelligent. For instance, a dolphin’s EQ (emotional intelligence) is extraordinarily high. Dolphins have been spoken of by scientists as “non-human” persons, they are so smart.
Therefore, they also have sufficient intelligence for self-awareness, and they should have self-awareness.
If you say no, then you are denying logic, or you must be in the only other option for reason below-

THE ONLY OTHER WAY THIS COULD WORK OUT

no animals have self-awareness except the human species.
Self-awareness is a monumental benefit to any species, so much that humans are superior to all other species largely in part because of it.
Evolution chose to give the human species self-awareness and not any other species on the planet.
Why did the human species gain self-awareness over all other creatures, even though some other species hit the same minimal Intelligence for awareness?

Science is always attempting to compare human intelligence to animals. I’d love to hear what science has to say on this situation.

Sorry science I don’t have a PHD, so you denied my twenty-page paper to your journals, maybe consider not committing internal credential fallacies and actually look at people’s ideas?

If I discovered the cure to all diseases in a bottle, they’d probably deny the paper. Science should focus on logic, rationale and facts over credentials and paper format.

It’s all love, but I feel good ideas should be accepted over logistics.

Just accept good ideas.

-Jarom

The Meaning of My Blog Name

“No attachment is freedom”. The name of my entire blog. What does this even mean? To be honest, I’d say that for most people, the name of my blog alone brings a certain level of comfort. There is something peaceful in just the mere idea of being able to be detached from all external things.

Meaning

I think the meaning is quite self-explanatory. To live your life almost entirely free of any emotional attachments to anyone or anything. This means your happiness is originated almost entirely from within, not from another person, car, house, your body, house or anything outside your consciousness. This does not mean you can’t allow things or people to add to your happiness, but the goals are to optimize emotional well-being to its fullest extent, alone, first.

for example, a breakup won’t break you, you will still be genuinely content and happy without that individual. While they may have added to your joy, they did not make your joy. This same logic is to be used in every other external factor in your little world.

Why?

We are in a society, that from birth, all our subjective experiences are geared towards finding external things to emotionally attach to. From the moment we start comprehending self-awareness, our consciousness is emotionally tossing itself out to whatever it so chooses. Even as a child, we were doing this. From video games to toys, we were already subconsciously giving away our emotional wellbeing to external things. As teenagers, we began dating and already giving our hearts away to people we barely even knew at the time.

As we become adults, it gets no better. If anything, our attachments to people and things just continues to grow. We become somewhat obsessed with houses, new cars, money, validation, sports, our bodies and other external matters. The most potent of all these things is other people, as in relationships. We are in a sense, tossing our happiness out like candy to all sorts of various things, subconsciously hoping they will all collectively hold up our emotional well-being.

The monumental issue with doing this, is any given day, you could lose all of these things. To broaden the perspective, even if you lost one thing, your happiness is going to be smothered. A man obsessed with money is only one bad recession from losing it. A person madly in love is only a breakup away from losing their world. Someone obsessed with their bodies and physical appearance is only one injury away from emotional destruction. The average individual in society is attached to everything except themselves.

It’s not only about “things” or “people” regarding attachment, but also the innate aspect of yourself. The innate emotional clinging to every negative issue or energy you receive. Yes, we all innately have these things, it’s a part of us naturally, yet just because it’s innate does not mean it is helping us. It’s actually destroying us, subtly. How many otherwise good men are weak and fragile with their lust? How many people can’t let go of arguments, road rage, rude energy or disrespect? how many people depend on validation to keep moving forward on their ideas? Even if you feel complete justification for acting upon these matters, you are still losing. What is happiness without freedom? These are powerful natural strings that have us tied down and it takes comprehension of this in order to tear away from them. Take mental notes.

This is concerning to me. Most people don’t even understand themselves, who they are and what their purpose is. They just follow society, running from high-to-high throwing up their happiness to everything around them like dollar bills in a strip club.

Suffering Vs. Detachment

A part of the reason detachment brings peace is due to its colossal ability to almost entirely stiff-arm suffering. Emotional suffering will be radically reduced by detachment. I firmly believe, that with correct mediation and mental comprehension, you could literally lose all things in your life and still continue to feel authentic content. If an individual lost everything, was forced into a state of being entirely alone with nothing, they could in fact feel the refreshing waters of peace through it all. If you actually think about it, a massive portion of human suffering comes from losing attachment to something or someone. This one concept is the author of sorrow for most people. To radically cut out the potential for mental anguish in your life is a comfortable, calming thought, in itself.

How

The reality is most people are not going to be able to hide away in the mountains and live the life of a monk. This is terribly unrealistic. I do believe that there are three ways to attain the fullness of detachment for anyone though. They are:

Perspective
Meditation
Self-awareness

Perspective: Understand the reality of this existence. The value of the moment and time. A true comprehension of how beautiful life is, has potent power. Just knowing that at any given moment you could leave this existence, is to be deeply valued. How many people actually are in the “moment”? How many people worldview is drowning in ignorance? Perspective takes time and considerable mindfulness for most people to achieve. We must understand the world for how it “actually” is, not what we wish it would be.

Meditation is quite self-explanatory. It is the act of manually stopping everything in your life, putting all obligations on hold, to focus on nothing but a specific thought. The act of mental exercise will create a secure, hefty and robust mind, putting each thought on a leash. Imagine how that would affect your peace? Meditation is ridiculously underrated and underused. It single handedly, is the answer to world peace. I said what I said.

Self-awareness is in regard to external factors in your life. Such as a new commitment or your possessions. Awareness is knowing how your emotions are connected to these things. Having comprehension of what exactly is occurring to your emotions allows one to stop it before it dives off the ledge. This takes time for most people also, considering we are emotional creatures and usually aren’t thinking about “emotions”, we just go with the flow, thus opening the door to suffering.

Final thoughts

We start comprehension as a child, trying to figure out reality and be accepted. Our ignorance as a child typically leads us into a losing existence of attachments and suffering as we grow into adults. It doesn’t matter if you’re rich, famous and attractive, if you’re unhappy you, the emotional well-being that gives you reason to live is dehydrated and starving. Just as much as your subjective experience is only yours, you’re entirely responsible for your own happiness and liberation. This is all up to you. No one can jump into your “experience” and change this issue. This is the reality of life. The beautiful truth about all of this is we all can find authentic peace in this existence through meditation, honest perspective and legitimate self-awareness.

As yourself, as you read this right now… “am I honestly happy and content”?

-Jarom